Deterioration
by SakamotoBlossom
Summary: After a mission one day, Allen Walker collapses, due to some sickness at is attacking his body. Slowly losing his fight, Allen feels more alone than ever, but Lavi and Kanda are trying to change that feeling. LavixAllenxKanda. Rated M for later possibly
1. Chapter 1

I do not own -man or any characters belonging to it.

Recently started getting into -man, so I decided to start writing again. My writing skills are rusty. So please bear with me while I get back into the swing of things. Please enjoy this. I am open to CONSTRUCTIVE NICE CRITICISM! So be nice about it, or else. So Enjoy haha.

_**Love SakamotoBlossom**_

**Bold - inner**

_Thoughts - Italics_

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><p>Crash!<p>

The broken shards of a mug scattered on the ground, the hot cocoa inside splattering on the ground. The white hair boy stood there, a shocked expression on his face. Looking to his hand, he saw the shaking. For a few months now, Allen noticed changes. For one thing, his left hand would shake at times and he felt somewhat more tired than usual. It didn't seem too important at the time so Allen never thought much of it. But this... was a bad sign.

Allen Walker was a Exorcist of the organization known as the Black Order. He had been there for some time now and lived comfortably with the friends there. Everything had been fine. Up until some recent Akuma attacks that is. He depended on his arm, his parasitic type weapon, to fight. It was his weapon. So having it tremble so was not a good sign. Allen clenched his fist shut, managing to stop the shaking. He let out a shaky breath. He couldn't have problems with his arm... He can't let anyone know.

Gathering up the shards and being careful to not cut himself in the process, the white haired boy threw them away, cleaning up the spill. Luckily he had been in his room at the time, so no one had seen this little incident. Not even a moment after he finished cleaning everything up, Allen was disturbed by a knock at his door. Lavi popped his head in the doorway, a grin spread across his face. "Come on Allen, its dinner time." He said. "Move it Moyashi!" He heard Kanda yell. Putting up a smile, Allen went along with them. "Great! I'm hungry!"

It had been a month later since the incident. And although Allen wished everything would be fine, his wish was ignored. Things only got worse. The shaking got worse. It took almost everything Allen had to hide it from the others. He was sure the others were getting suspicious now. Lenalee had definitely noticed something, asking Allen if he was alright. "I am fine." he simply said, putting up a smile. It seemed to convince her for a while. Allen wasn't really too concerned with her. It was more Lavi and Kanda that he was worried about. Actually, more Kanda. He was sharp, so it was difficult to get past him on that facade.

One day, Lavi, Allen and Kanda were called to Komui's office. "I have a mission for you three. Go an retrieve the innocence as usual." He said to them, peering at them behind his glasses. Lenalee stood near him, having brought him his favorite coffee a moment ago and tried to motivate him to get some work actually done. Of course, he would listen to her. "Its over in Germany. Shouldn't be too much of a challenge for you all." Komui told them. The all nodded and within the hour, they were on a train.

Allen leaned against the window, Lavi chatting besides him on the train seat. Kanda sat on the opposite side of them. When Lavi brought up the topic of eating lunch, he was met with a surprising thing. "I'm not really hungry." Allen said, looking out the cold glass window, out at the snow covered ground. Even Kanda reacted, looking a bit shocked.

"Your not Hungry? Wow, that is a first." Lavi said, looking slightly concerned over at Allen. "Something up?" He asked the white haired exorcist. The other only shook his head. "I'm fine. Just tired." He told him. Lavi and Kanda exchanged glances. "You sure?" The red head asked, pressing on to try and get something out of the other. "I said I'm fine. I am gonna take a nap, wake me when we get there..." He muttered, eye shutting. Clearly something was up that the other didn't want to talk about. But what was it? Even Kanda was curious, though when half the time, he wouldn't give a crap about the moyashi.

Perhaps it was the fact that the three had grown somewhat closer over time that he felt some concern. Whatever the reason was, they would have to speak to Allen. But for now, they would let him rest. '_Who knows..._' They thought. '_Allen might tell us on his own._'

With the clacking sound of the train tracks as the only noise besides breathing, the ride was spent in silence. Looking over the white haired boy, Kanda noticed a few things. There was a slight shiver to him, but he figure it may have been caused by being against the window of the train and due to the cold weather. After all, it was winter. Snow lined the ground up to one's knees. So shivering wasn't too abnormal. What was abnormal was the fact Allen looked a little paler than usual. A little listless looking. There were some dark looking circles under his eyes. Was he having trouble with sleeping? Was that why he was so tired now? Kanda grumbled to himself.

Lavi leaned over, looking down upon the exorcist. The Bookman-in-training looked him over, trying to see the other's face better. Having not truly fallen asleep, Allen felt the movement on the seat and could feel the other's breath going onto his face. He sighed. "Can I help you?" He said, with a slight irritated tone as he opened his eyes and sat up straight, eyeing the redhead. Lavi rubbed his head sheepishly. "Oh nothing..." he said, looking back at the other. "Allen... I really don't mean to keep asking, but really, what is wrong with you? You don't look so good, plus you even didn't want to eat." Lavi said. The train came to a halt and Allen stood up quickly. "I told you before! I am fine!" His voice raised and he walked out of the train car and right out of the train to the platform, Lavi and Kanda following after him. After having Allen shout like that, Lavi decided to drop it for a while.

For what seemed like hours, they walked around the streets of germany, trying to track down the innocence that they were sent for. Eventually, they made their way to what appeared to be an abandoned town. The brick buildings were in ruins. Vines grew over broken down walls and posts. The snow there was pure white, showing no one went around there. Allen was about to suggest they check somewhere else when he heard a noise. To him it sounded like a kid laughed. "What in the world...?" He muttered, turning his head around to vaguely catch sight of something running by. Allen turned and ran in the direction of the laughing. "Huh? Allen?" "Moyashi?" They looked in the direction the other ran in, heading on after him. Allen stopped looking down the paths. There were no foot prints, yet he had seen something. He had heard something. "hahaha~!" There was the laughing. Allen started to run again, going around in that ruin maze. "Hey! Wait up! What is going on?" Lavi yelled, having a bit of a hard time keeping up with the other.

The laughing voice lead Allen and the others to a back area. It looked like- "A grave yard." Allen breathed, looking at the many old and broken down graves. Names were so worn down, they couldn't be deciphered. On particular grave caught Allen's attention. His breath hitched. It looked like Mana's grave. Memories swarmed him and he felt like he couldn't take in air. Kanda and Lavi approached, looking around, seeing their friend stunned. "Moyashi?" Kanda called, bring him out of his little stupor. Then, that was when it reacted. Allen's eye. He looked around, putting up a offensive stance. "Akuma!" he shouted. The others got ready, Kanda with mugen and Lavi with his hammer. There were a swarm of level 2s surrounding them. The second they attacked, the three countered. Dealing with a few of them, Allen faced off with the last one. "This one, it is close to turning into a level 3." Alerted Allen. They couldn't let this happen. The town nearby would be in a lot of danger if it were to turn to level three and then to go ravage the place.

Its appearance looked like that of a bird, whose wings were pluck and falling out. It screeched, the high sound causing the three to throw their hands up to cover their ears. It's screeching stopped and it flew around them, circling like a vulture circling a dead carcass. With almost every wing beat, blades of air rained down. The vulture akuma focused its attacks on Lavi and Kanda, losing sight of Allen, who had slipped around and ducked near a large grave. Looking at his arm quickly, he activated his innocence and began his attack. It wasn't easy, since he had to jump onto the back of it in order to get any effective hits. After somehow being caught within the claws of the beast, Allen finally landed the end hit. The akuma fell in defeat, releasing the cut up exorcist. "Nice Job Allen!" Lavi called, going over to the other. "Hn." Kanda gave his own sort of approval for the battle. Allen gave a sheepish grin, his arm turning back to its relatively normal appearance. They had made a motion to leave, Lavi and Kanda passing him. Looking over his shoulder for a moment back at the other, Kanda saw Allen wasn't following them. Instead, he other seemed to go limp and fall forward, crashing upon the snow unceremoniously. "Moyashi!" "Allen!"

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><p>Pretty short... Sorry. Wrote this rather late at night. Oh well.<p>

I know, they are pretty out of character, but that is to be expected :P

Tried my best to stay true to their characters. Please tell me how I did? :)

_**Love SakamotoBlossom**_


	2. Chapter 2

I do not own -man or any characters belonging to it.

So here it is, chapter two. Hope it is good haha. I was really happy seeing your comments. I am glad you all took interest in this story. I shall do my best for you all~!

_**Love SakamotoBlossom**_

**Bold - inner**

_Thoughts – Italics_

* * *

><p>He did not know what happened. After the fight, things had been sort of blur to him. One moment, Allen had been feeling alright and then the next, he felt like his body had just shut down. As if someone had turn off a light switch, his vision had gone dark and he had tumbled down onto the snow. He felt light, feeling like he wasn't touching anything, just floating.<p>

When his eyes had opened back up, he found himself not looking at the broken walls of the abandoned town he was in previously. Instead, he was looking up at a white tiled ceiling. Looking dazed, he peered around, coming to realization that it was the infirmary of Black Order. "How did I… get back here?" He muttered out, sitting up. His body felt stiff and weakened.

He didn't call out for anyone, instead, Allen moved his legs over the side of the cot, moving himself to stand up. He walked a few steps, before his legs just gave out. He yelped out of surprise, catching himself on a small table in the room. The noise he made alerted the nurse there as well as Lenalee, who had been with her. "Allen! Your awake!" She cried, rushing right over to her friend.

"Lenalee? What is going on? How did I get back here?" He asked. The black haired girl looked at him. "You don't remember? You passed out on the mission. Lavi and Kanda brought you back." Allen looked a bit stunned. "Allen, you have been asleep for three days straight. We tried to wake you up, but you were like a rock, just out cold." Allen couldn't believe it. He had slept for three days! Three days!

Seeing that Allen was still on the floor, the nurse and Lenalee helped lift him to stand and helped him back to the cot. He wouldn't be able to go anywhere for a while, the nurse had said. Not until they could figure out what was wrong with him. It was Komui's orders.

For a week, he was tested for almost every possible thing. They knew the parasitic innocence took a toll on its user, but they had no idea how much of a toll it would take. So far, they had gathered that whatever was making him so weak, had to do with his innocence. After a while, Allen claimed he was better and he appeared to be as well. The white haired exorcist's appetite was back and he seemed to have a bit more energy. So he was allowed out of the infirmary to go back to his own room and get back to missions.

Even though he was free to do what he wanted again, Allen could tell he was still being watched. Kanda and Lavi were around him more often. He could feel their eyes on him. And Lenalee and the others weren't any better. Insisting on helping him. Allen felt annoyed. He was feeling fine yet everyone was still making a fuss about it. It was bothering him to no end.

Wanting to release some frustrations, he tried to find someone to train a little with. Finding no one surprisingly, Allen went on his own to the training room. With his innocence activated in there, Allen trained, going after imaginary Akuma. It didn't take long until something started to happen. His innocence turned back on its own. Looking his arm curiously, Allen was overwhelmed with vertigo, falling right to the ground. He started to cough, feeling light there was something in his lungs. He coughed and hacked away, on his side. In between the coughs, he called out as best as he could. "H-help!" He shouted. "Someone!" On the ground near by, Allen saw something. No doubt now, he knew something was wrong. On the ground, what was on the ground, were speckles of red. Blood. Allen couldn't deny something was wrong now. There was serious proof right there.

Allen was kept in the infirmary, more test being run on him. His skin looked paler than normal, if possible. While his body was looking bad, his mind was even worse. Allen was breaking. His arm refused to activate and any smile on his face was always forced, fake to the core. Allen was trying to stay strong. Lenalee would nearly break into tears everytime she saw him in the infirmary, seeing how bad he was looking. Soon she just stopped going to see him. While the others went on missions, he was left behind, often on his own in that room. Allen felt lonely and hopeless.

No one was telling him much about what was wrong with him. And that made him scared. Often, tears would be shed and he would sob at night. He felt alone, that no one was there for him.

When Lavi and Kanda came back from a mission, the first thing on their mind was to go visit Allen. He had been able to leave the infirmary again and was in his room when the two went to find him. He looked completely depressed, yet tried to look happy when Kanda and Lavi stood at his door. "Hey Allen. How ya holdin' up?" Lavi asked stupidly. Kanda looked closely at him. "Oh… I'm fine…" The white haired exorcist said. "Moyashi, don't lie to us." Kanda said, causing Lavi to snap his head to him. "Hey! Don't be mean to-" He was cut off by sobs. Allen had in an instance, been reduced to tears. He fell to his knees, the two going right over to his sides. "I'm useless! I can't do anything! My innocence won't work! I can't go on missions! I am completely useless now!" He cried. He was in pain.

While he cried, Allen could feel arms just wrap around him, trying to sooth his tears away. Lavi and Kanda both held him close. He would expect this from Lavi possibly, but to be comforted by Kanda? He was caught off guard a bit. "It hurts… I'm all alone…" He said into someone's shirt. "Its alright Moyashi… we're here now." Kanda said. His sobs turned to mere sniffles and the soon, his breathing was even. He was leaned against Kanda, breathing softly as he had exhausted himself with crying. The black-haired exorcist lifted him up, feeling how light he was. He put him on the bed, Lavi staying on Allen's right, while he stayed on Allen's left. Looking at the other asleep, tear marks on his now peaceful looking face, the two couldn't leave his side. They wanted to keep Allen from fully breaking.

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><p>Pretty short again... oh well.<p>

Got a bit distracted. my chest hurts a little. Meh D:

Grahhhhh, Kanda is sooooo out of character. At least in my opinion.

I dunno... I kinda like it when really tough stubborn ass guys turn into softies. Its kinda cute.

Some constructive criticism is welcome. Tell me if you like this. I'll try to update chapters at least on mondays or wednesdays.

_**Love SakamotoBlossom**_


	3. note

My apologizes for not updating! I got loaded with schoolwork and a bunch of projects! Sorry! I am trying to upload by this weekend hopefully, so please look forward to that!

I just wanted to give a little heads up so no one thinks that everything is over haha. I still have to plan everything out. Everything will be good. I promise!

Oh! Quick little thing, I was looking through my old stories. I was like "Wtf was I on!" my god! I wanted to slap myself upside the head! XD

Oh, also, I might have an Ao no Exorcist oneshot coming out soon, so look forward to that too!

Until next time readers!

Love SakamotoBlossom


	4. Chapter 3

I do not own -man or any characters belonging to it.

So here it is, chapter three. I tried my best. I hope you all enjoy it.  
>Finally some things will be revealed.<p>

_**Love SakamotoBlossom**_

**Bold - inner**

_Thoughts – Italics_

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><p>They had stayed with him through that night, sitting awake with him when he woke up crying and lying with him when he had tired himself out. Although Lavi as the only one to say the soothing words, Kanda showed just by staying there that he cared. He didn't need to say the words. As the time went on, Allen found himself finding comfort when they were around. For a moment, he could feel better when with them.<p>

Allen's aching feeling of being alone was fading, having Lavi and Kanda by his side. Lavi would cheer him up, joking with him and giving him attention, while Kanda was more the type who made sure he was taking care of himself. Kanda would always bring Allen to get food, making him eat everything. He was trying to get the other better physically while the redhead was trying to help him get better mentally.

And for a while, it was working. The white haired exorcist was feeling better. His mood was picking up, his appetite coming back as well. His arm had yet to start working again, but Allen believed in due time, it would work once more. He would be useful again.

He had been left resting in his room, his two friends had been called to Komui's office. Allen stayed behind, reading and waiting for them to return. When he thought they were taking too long, the book snapped shut and Allen rose from his bed, waltzing right out of his room and going down the many hallways. Even now he still had the tendency of getting lost, but that was rare. So, with ease, Allen walked along to Komui's office, the door slightly ajar. Someone had not been paying much attention when going to close it. Hearing voices, Allen saw they were still talking.

The white haired man knew that eavesdropping was wrong, but he just couldn't help himself. So he peered right in, ears listening to the words.

"So, we have gained some insight as to what is making him ill…" Komui said, hands folded and his chin propped up on them. Lavi stood at the edge of the desk, looking at him, while Kanda stood off in the room, looking intently. "We had a feeling that it was from his arm. As we know, the parasitic innocence take a toll on its user. We knew that well." He said. "But at the rate that it is progressing, we can't do too much. It's picking away at his body. He's useless to us now." The way he said it was so matter-of-factly. "All you two can do for now is just keep taking care of him until we can decide what do to."

Allen was in shock. Why was he not included in this meeting? After all, he deserved to know more than anyone to know what was going on with himself. The way Komui was taking to Lavi and Kanda, it was like them taking care of him was just a job that they were assigned too. His breath hitched in his throat, causing a faint sound to come out. Kanda perked slightly, looking to the door, having caught the sound. The black-haired excorsit went over, opening the door fully. "Moyashi?" Lavi turned. "A-allen? What are you doing here? We were just about to go get you…"

Allen glared with a hurt look. "W-when…" He started to say, "When were you going to tell me about this!" His voice rose. "When were you going to tell me what was wrong with me!" He felt hurt. "Allen, we were going to tell you…" Lavi went forward to the white-haired boy, who jerked away from him. "You weren't going to… don't lie to me! This was just a job to you guys, isn't it! You never really cared! Your just doing what your told to do!" He could feel hot tears burn his eyes, some falling down his pale face. Allen backed even further away from them. "I won't stand for that!" he looked to Komui. "No need to have anyone be burdened with taking care of me. I'm leaving!" He stormed away, disappearing in the halls of the order. Komui rubbed the bridge of his nose.

"Go and find him." He said. The two only nodded. Lavi went in search of Allen, looking in one part of the order, while Kanda looked in the other. Their friends helped as well, looking everywhere that Allen could possibly be. In the order, there was no sign of the boy. After going around to see if anyone had seen him, they gathered information. Allen had left.

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><p>gasp! Allen is missing! Where did he go! Lets play "Where's Allen?" or maybe "Where in the world is Allen Walker?"<p>

Where's Waldo and where in the world is Carmen Sandiego reference... feh fail

Sigh... short XP

Sorry about the lateness of it all. I have finals coming soon. Plus I have been hit with the lazy bug.

Well, at least I did something. :3

I hope with what I wrote so far is ok.

_**Love SakamotoBlossom**_


	5. Author's note I'm back!

Hello there my dearly readers. It has been far to long hasn't it? I am glad to see in my absence that people still review the story and wish for it to continue. All your comments made me very happy. So I suppose you all will be happy to know I shall be continuing and start writing new chapters soon. We shall finally find Allen~!

Please stay tuned and I promise to have a new chapter up soon.

Until then,

Sakamotoblossom.


	6. Chapter 4

I do not own -man or any characters belonging to it.

Holy shitsicles. I have not written anything in so long. I hope ya all can forgive me. It was a very turbulent time and I have not had the time to post lovely chapters for all of you. I hope I can make it up to you all with new chapters.

Oh on a side note, I did actually have another chapter for this, but alas when my sweet baby imac died on me, everything was taken with it. How sad right? But I think this one came out much better. I need to get back into the swing of things, so if anyone notices some differences, feel free to alert me. Kay? Good.

_**Love SakamotoBlossom**_

**Bold - inner**

_Thoughts – Italics_

"Go and find him." Komui had said to them. An order that neither the exorcist nor the bookman would go against. They needed to find their companion before any trouble arose, or worse, before he could potentially hurt himself. It was wrong of them to hide their meeting with Komui from the moyashi, since after all; it was about him and concerned his condition. The tone that he had heard the Chief Officer of the Black Order use probably did not make anything better. With the day that he had, his tone became unnecessarily harsh and cold. Allen must have been completely hurt by the conversation, even though it had not been the intention. Komui wanted to find the source of what was making Allen so sick like this and a cold tone was not like him. The white haired exorcist should have realized it but alas, he had not and damage had been done.

The order was in a complete ruckus, with all the close friends of Allen chipping in and looking around when they had time to do so. There was no sign of him at all inside, making Lavi as well as Kanda worry. Was Allen alright? Was he in a safe place? Or was he gone, in pain and feeling betrayed by himself? The guilt was hitting them like a brick wall. How could they have harmed him like this?

The two readied themselves to go out, dressing for the cold snow just outside the walls. Gazing out, Kanda grew furious, angry with himself. The poor cement wall bared the brunt of his anger when Kanda's fist made contact. "Damn it! Where the hell did he go?" Anger with himself forced itself out as anger towards Allen. They had noticed nothing in the other's room had been touched, and his jacket was gone. At least he had a coat, but that would only do him some good in this weather. The forecast had been a storm would be approaching and conditions would be dangerous. "Calm down Yu." Lavi addressed, putting a gloved hand on his shoulder. "We need to just worry about finding him and making sure he is safe and sound." At least the red head had a level head right now. Or at least it appeared so. He was worried.

While over the course of them looking after Allen and taking care of him, he realized how important they were to the white haired being and how important he was to them. They needed each other now. After harming Allen like this, they had to clear the air and repair what had been damaged, before any permanent breaks could be made. He only hoped that Allen would forgive them still.

Leaving the order and going into the cold world that was darkening, they searched around. It was like looking for a needle in a haystack. Any tracks were being covered up by the free falling snow, blurring out any hope. Kanda was beginning to wish he could cut the clouds and get rid of all this godforsaken cold weather. Just when things started to look bleak, they noticed the distant lights ahead. A town! "Yu… He could be there." Lavi stated, nearly smacking himself at how stupid they had been. Allen would have probably headed there! He at least had some sense to not go wandering around like an idiot! "Let's go!" Kanda and he picked up their pace, running now through the snow that only seemed to want to hinder them.

The town was not lively at this time. The occasional pub that they stopped to check in was filled with drunks and loose women, none of them having any idea who Allen was or if they had even seen him. The only information that they got was the fact that a man said he would 'totally bang Kanda if he didn't have a dick.' Suffice to say, that only made things worse and caused that man to suddenly lose the ability to be conscious. Kanda had hit him so hard; the man was out within moments.

"Allen!" Lavi's voice called out though was suppressed. They could see nothing and hear nothing. "It's getting late… Maybe he returned back to the order…" The redhead could only hope. Dark eyes gazed off into the white flurry, and noticed something out of the ordinary. A large snowflake that wasn't falling down but rather, flying erratically. The 'snowflake' grew closer and closer until it just about smacked right into Kanda's chest. "Timcanpy?" Neither of them was expecting to see this odd creature here yet at the same time, it was a sign of relief. If Timcanpy was here, Allen must be near. The golem buzzed around, biting at their clothes and tugging them, trying to get a message to them. He was going to lead them to Allen. That was clear.

Following the small, golden ball-like creature, the group arrived at a bridge. "Allen!" Lavi thought the worst, running to the side of the bridge, to see if the other might have jumped. He prayed that this was not the case. Kanda looked around, and noticed Timcanpy trying to get their attention again, by how it flew to the edge and underneath the bridge. Finding a way down, they hurried to catch up.

Underneath the bridge, Allen laid, nearly covered in snow that blew under. It looked like the golem might have dragged him under, to protect him and save him. God knows how Allen might have fared if the creature had not saved him. "Hang in there Allen!" The two ran over to his limp form, lifting him up and brushing the snow from his body. Seeing an all too pale skin tone, Kanda reached up and brushed his hand under the other's bangs, feeling his skin freezing. "Moyashi! Open your eyes. Wake up!" The dark haired man ordered, shaking Allen. Lavi shouted at him, telling him to not shout, when a reaction came from the white haired boy. A groan of exhaustion mixed with pain fell from pale lips and his eyes cracked open. Tear tracks were clear on his cheeks, eyes red. He had been crying. A shudder ran through his body, making him go limp once more. At least he was alive. Expecting Kanda to lash out at the boy, Lavi prepared to snatch him away, only to be surprised when the other unzipped his coat and put it on Allen. "We have to get some shelter. The snow is only going to get worse and I don't want to risk carrying him through it." Kanda said. Lavi only nodded in agreement.

After securing the coat on the white haired boy, Lavi helped load him onto Kanda's back and they hurried to locate an inn to stay at. There was one not too far away, though the elderly man running it claimed that all rooms were taken. His wife, a kind looking soul, stopped them before they could even think of leaving and said that there was a room left, but it was small and only one bed was there. Without a thought they accepted it, thanking her.

Once in the room, the two took on the task of reheating their fallen companion. Survival training was kicking in. First, get out of the cold clothing. If awake, Allen would have made a fuss about being undressed to the point of near nudity, save for the fact they had just stripped him to his underwear. But at the moment he put up no fight. Their hands ghosted over his body, treating him as if he was a fragile porcelain doll. He might as well be one in this condition. Once out of the clothes, Lavi worked him under the covers. His gaze softened when looking him over. He seemed so small. Looking over to Kanda, they momentarily made eye contact, as if silently communicating before looking away and undressing their own clothes until down to their own undergarments. Body heat was the best remedy in this situation. The covers of the small bed were lifted up and the two bodies joined the weak one. It was difficult, finding a suitable position for them all, so that none would be falling off and the body in the middle would not be cold. In the end, things were settled, with Allen's back pulled against Lavi's chest as well as being half curled on Kanda. With the rise and fall of Kanda's chest, Allen's head would lift up gently and go back down. Gradually things were getting warmer.

Once more making eye contact with one another, an odd spark of emotion was shared before looking down at the sleeping moyashi between them. His face was clear of any signs of pain and no groans escaped. Allen looked at peace. The bookman had been lost in his thoughts when he saw a hand stroke through the short colorless hair. Kanda, with tenderness so unlike him, was smoothing the damp and messy hair. "Rest well Allen…" Lavi whispered and the room settled into a comfortable silence, in which only the soft sound of breathing and heartbeats could be heard.

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><p>Wow, it has been a really long time since I have written. I feel so out of it. I haven't read Dgrayman in forever. I have been waiting for updates on the manga haha. Oh well. I think I did a good job. Tried to keep things in character as best as I could. Again, be sure to review and tell me if anything is amiss. I just love hearing from you all. Just make sure it is positive. Besides all that, please enjoy this~!<p>

_**Love SakamotoBlossom**_


	7. Chapter 5

It was slowly becoming more apparent as he worked closer and closer to waking up that it was far too hot. Way too hot for comfort. But that didn't make sense. Shouldn't it have been cold? The farthest back that he could think back to was just before he passed out and landed in the snow. Snow should be cold. Not hot. And snow certainly shouldn't have been this odd feeling and holding him down and certainly should not be breathing right into his neck. Wait. Breathing. Cracking his eyes open, Allen grew aware of the situation he was in and the 'snow' that was making things so hot.

Red hair was what tipped him off to what was breathing on his neck. Lavi was there, arms wrapped around his torso and hands close to his chest, almost so close that it would be considered groping. Well, actually it was. He felt the other twitch in his sleep and the bookman's hands flexed slightly on his chest, sending a shiver through him at the feeling. His head was at Allen's neck, his soft breathing blowing against his skin. Then he grew aware of whom he was on top of. While Lavi was resting partially on Allen, Allen was resting his head on Kanda's chest. In his line of sight, the white haired male could see the raven locks of the other.

Why were they there? How did he get here? Where was even 'here'? So many questions that Allen did not have an answer for. But there was one really important question. "Why are we naked…" It came out mumbled at first. That got barely a reaction. "Why am I naked…." A little bit of a shift was felt by the two bodies. "Why are you both naked…" Heads lifted with a minor groan and yawn. "What did ya say Allen?" Lavi said while suppressing his yawn. "Why the hell are we naked and in a bed together!" Allen said loudly, effectively waking the others up fully. "Damn it Moyashi, could you be any louder and more stupid? We aren't completely naked." Kanda pointed out, Allen sitting up off him and having Lavi move. "Fine then, why are we close to being naked?!" The white haired male rephrased his question. "Body heat is the best when trying to warm up. Unless you wanted to get hypothermia, this was the best course of action." Lavi explained in place of their other companion.

That certainly explained a lot but nonetheless did not make Allen happy. He remembered why he had been out in the snow, why he had left the order. So without another word, he left the bed and searched out his clothes. Having been soaked from the snow, by now they were dry and wearable. "Where do you think you are going?" Kanda said as he got up as well, dressing in his own garb. Lavi watched silently, eyes drifting from Allen to Kanda and then over to Timcanpy. Nature was calling so the redhead had to dismiss himself momentarily to use the bathroom that was just through the door in the room. "Leaving. Why would you even care where I go? Oh that's right, Komui is making you and Lavi keep watch on the order's little burden." He said with bitterness to his tone. "Not true!" Yelled the bookman from behind the bathroom door.

As Allen tried to leave, something caught hold of him and threw him back onto the bed. Kanda pinned him down using his body weight against the all too skinny boy. "Do you think if we didn't care that we wouldn't be out in the snow looking for you and then trying to warm you back up? We could have very well just left you there in the snow but we didn't." Although Kanda's tone was harsh and stern at first, there was an undertone that was slowly emerging. "We care about you Moyashi… more than you realize." It was said so lowly, and in such a way that it made Allen turn light red, a shiver running through him at the tone. Everything was silent, with the two of them just staring at one another, neither breaking eye contact until the sound of water running and the bathroom door opening broke them apart. Lavi scanned over them, looking closely at the body language between them before the two pulled apart. Jealousy flashed within his chest at the sight of them but was gone swiftly enough as he went and dressed himself. "We are heading back to the order and that is that." Kanda said, catching a lingering look from both of them. Allen didn't protest again, mind filled with other matters. After prepping, they left, Allen situated between Lavi and Kanda as they marched back to the order.

Komui was not happy in the least bit when they returned. He scolded Allen for running off but then apologized for what he heard. It was all a misunderstanding. But things still felt tense. Lenalee tracked Allen down in the order and assaulted him with an embrace, having been so worried for the other. It made the white haired exorcist a little uneasy with how everyone was acting. He figured they would have been a bit madder with him. But they weren't and he supposed that he should take it as a good thing. After all that and a meal, Allen was back into his room. Lavi and Kanda were taking turns in keeping an eye on him, to make sure that he would not be leaving again. Without even realizing it, Allen had fallen asleep for a while. Lavi must have left for a while and Kanda was nowhere to be found when he woke up, covered in sweat and his heart pounding in his chest. His dream had been horrid. Whatever was making him ill, it was eating his body, making him fall apart as if he had been a monster held together by tearing stitches. It frightened him. Allen left his bedroom, and stumbled along through the halls, just trying to find someone, anyone to try and calm his heart. What he found was Kanda.

All but falling against a wall at the sight of the other, he called out to him. Kanda dashed over, helping hold Allen up. His legs felt like jelly, like they would give out if the other was not pinning him up on the wall. Allen babbled, words stumbling past his lips as he explained his dream. He felt helpless, useless, felt like he was dying.

Then things changed. There against the wall in the darken hall that was only lit by the moonlight that was casted in through a window, Kanda pressed the white haired exorcist into the wall, arms holding him up and lips pressed up against lips, silencing the babbling one.

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><p>Blargh, don't hate me for being such a horrible updater! I had a ton of computer issues and the entire summer I had spent with my father and did not have access to a computer. I had started writing out this chapter a while before but completely lost it somewhere on my old computer. So that means that I had to start from scratch. Hopefully it came out well haha.<p>

Left a little bit of a cliff hanger. Things will get a whooooole lot better from this point. :3 I probably will do a few more chapters, make some delicious moments and all that. I have to figure out where I was going with this whole story. haha Don't worry, I shall not abandon this!

Like before I am sort of out of my groove of writing so if there are any mess ups, please let me know. I love helpful information.

Feel free to send me a message. I have a tumblr now so if anyone wants that link, just ask.

So that is about it for now. I shall try to upload again by friday or sometime next week. But you all know how I am with updating. I'll try though! Just for you guys!

**Love SakamotoBlossom**

**Added: ARGH My word changed Lavi to Lava. I fixed it now. Thank you sweet sonia for pointing that out to me ^^**


	8. Chapter 6

I do not own -man or any characters belonging to it.

Oh my gooooood. I am such an awful uploader. I never update when I say I will. Ugh. I am horrible! I beg forgiveness from you all!  
>Well I can at least blame some of my lateness on the Hurricane Sandy. I live on the East Coast so yea, I saw some of that action. I am used to it. We northerners are used to the storms and the cold. You should see our winters and the nor'easters. We be tough! Grr!<em><strong><strong>_

_**Love SakamotoBlossom**_

**Bold - inner**

_Thoughts – Italics_

His breath was taken away and he stood stunned against the lips and body that both pinned him and held him up. All thought went out the window and the links within his mind tried to kick back up and speed up the process of thinking to make up for lost time. After a blank mind, now so many things flooded in. He couldn't even keep up with this whirl wind and before he knew it, Kanda was calling his name, trying to break him out of his reverie. He looked rather concerned so Allen responded. Inarticulately, with many mumbles and stumbles of words. "Order to Beansprout. Is your brain that fried?" Kanda said, looking at him expectantly. "Better now?" Surprisingly yes, he felt better and thus nodded his head because he felt like his brain was still not functioning properly enough. "Good. Now, back to bed. I was just on my way there to keep an eye on you."

Kanda backed off and allowed Allen to find his legs and stand on his own. Once that was settled, he escorted the white haired male back to is room, seeing to it that he was seated in his bed and under the covers. It might have seemed like overkill, how the other kept a way too close eye on him, making sure he was tucked into bed and going to turn the lights out for him. After that, Kanda took a seat on a chair against the wall facing the bed. "Get some rest. Komui has been looking into a way to try and cure you. You will need to be well rested if you are going to deal with him tomorrow." Technically speaking, it would be later that day. "Good night." Allen finally pronounced, getting a humming response from Kanda. Knowing that he was under good care, a calm lull overcame him and Allen was able to fall back into slumber, feeling better than when he had woken up.

Morning came, Kanda had gone and Lavi was now there, not occupying the seat at the wall, but rather, up on the bed facing Allen. Nearly scared the dickens out of him, but after having been in bed with him before, even naked, this wasn't too horrifying. "Looks like someone is finally awake. Heard about your mid night walking." There was a look within his eyes that made Allen feel like he knew even more about that than Allen was even aware of. His face flushed and he refused to question anything, the kiss, or how Lavi might know. He was still confused though, as to why Kanda did that and why had it felt so… amazing.

"Come on, up and at'em! Got to go get some breakfast and then scoot you off to Komui's for a checkup. Hey, if you are good, I heard you get a sticker and a loli." The redhead flashed his charismatic smile at him. With strange motivation from that action, Allen got up from bed and changed, feeling a little conscious of the fact that Lavi was still in the room with him. Momentarily, he felt as if the other's eyes were on him but when he peered over, the other was looking elsewhere.

They two went to breakfast, and Allen saw no sign of Kanda around. Lenalee was in the dining hall with the others, all greeting him for the morning and clearing a seat for him. Lenalee was talking to him, saying that he should try to eat as much as he could. His bad appetite had been worrying the others and clearly he could see it written on their faces. "I will. I actually feel rather hungry today." A good sign that seemed to cheer the others up and food was brought for him. Allen seemed like his old self, eating much more than he had in weeks. Everyone could practically feel the relief in the room. Over breakfast, he was told what was going to be going on. Komui was going to try to have Hevlaska try and heal what was making him sick since it involved his innocence. It was worth a try. Lavi had left, saying some nonsense of where he was going. Allen had been rather distracted so he didn't pay attention.

Soon enough Allen finished eating and was personally escorted by Lenalee to Komui for this so called checkup. While it was overall an uncomfortable and tedious task, the results were actually positive. They believed this might be able to really help Allen, maybe stop this parasitic sickness soon. This good news really brought the white haired exorcist's mood up vastly and the first thought he had in his mind was to go and share this information with Lavi and Kanda. It was a bit strange to him that the first thought was that he wanted to go and tell them but yet at the same time, it wasn't strange. The memory of them sleeping in the same bed and then the memory of Kanda kissing him up against the wall flashed in his mind, causing his face to take on a rouge tint and his heart to pick up its pace. Suddenly he just wanted to see them sooner. So Allen went around looking for the two, asking if anyone had seen them. No one really had any answers but the best that he could get was that someone thought they saw them go into a training room. Figured they were probably sparring. With swiftness to his step, Allen came upon on of the training rooms in use but paused just as he moved the door. There was a heavy feeling in the air with a scent of sweat. A strange sound reached his ears and for a moment he thought it might just be sound emitted from fighting but what he saw on the other side of the door was not any sort of fighting at all. Well, they did look like they were fighting a little bit from the way that Kanda was thrusting his hips so hard and Lavi was pulling so roughly on his hair.

Allen was no spring chicken. He knew what was going on. But he just couldn't believe it. And what's worse was that he felt a pang of jealousy and wanted nothing more than to go right on in and join them. But he just couldn't move from that spot, eyes locked on the heated sight before him. Oh god oh god. Groans and moans flooded his ears and his entire face was a red hot as a chili pepper. He sucked in a breath when a particularly throaty groan went straight to his groin. He shifted, certainly body parts coming to attention. The door creaked and the two inside the room paused, with Kanda pressed deep inside the redhead. They drew in a collective shaky breath as eyes shifted and made contact. Now aware of their single audience member, there was a brief moment when time seemed to stop. Then someone spoke Allen's name and he fled down the hall, running to his room, while the Lavi and Kanda scrambled to get their clothes and chase after him.

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><p>Does anyone even know how hard it was for me to write just that little snippet between those two? I CANNOT DO IT! OH MY GOD I WAS DYING ;A;I can read the worst most racy smut ever but I can't write a simple scene. Oh god. That was just embarrassing for me. <p>

Oh well . hopefully it is not too awful and stupid to read. God knows I have to write other things for later chapters. I am dreading it!  
>Wish me luck my dear readers!<p>

_**Love SakamotoBlossom**_


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